*Note Names and locations have been changed to protect my privacy and the privacy of my family.*
Anger is unmet expectations….
So in these sessions I’ve been doing with this new therapist one of the most interesting concepts that I’ve encountered is that Anger is unmet expectations.
I’ve been challenged this week to ask myself what the expectations are when I get angry and see what happens.
Well I got angry at work, I remembered (due to a sticky in my Bullet Journal) that I was supposed to ask this. At first nothing came up. I had to calm down a bit first, then ask again.
Turns out I had expected to be done with working by now, I wanted to be a Stay-At-Home Mom for most of my life. And while financially that isn’t possible yet it was and still is an expectation that I had for my life. That I would get to be this particular version of a Mother that was home with her kids during their earliest years.
Here’s the thing, I’m not even ticked off at my husband, but rather my Mother. Who during a time of need years ago, locked me and my husband into a finacial contact that we can not get out of now (mortgage). Who also likes to hold this crap over my head as a reason for her “stress”. I doubt she realizes that by making us help her out I gave up the dream life I had wanted. And I know not being aprechiated for it not only sucks, but makes me extreamly angry.
Not that talking to her about it would help, all that would do is turn her into a defensive narcisist.